the one about carrie

So, it has been brought to my attention over time that I have a few similarities with a certain writer many of us came to love as we were blossoming into the ravishing 20-somethings we are today.

In case you have doubts… here is the evidence that has mounted over the past few years: I am a writer and like Carrie, I am notoriously led by my emotions. I have curly hair; please notice the universe’s refusal in allowing me to be a simple girl. Oh, and to answer your questions, yes, that is Robert Pattinson in the back. That, alone, has gotten me through the break-up. Believe it or not, I, too, own a Mac. I know it’s crazy.

I write in New York, but I have my eye on Paris. I have a love-hate relationship with smoking and I plan workouts with friends as if they were lunches. I do have cocktails during the week with the same fabulous people over and over again and if I told you the stories that I’ve heard play out on the streets and beds of New York City, they would have extended the show out for one more season. Somewhere between Big & Aidan. 

To top it off, I, also, have a BIG ex boyfriend. A romantic foil to my novel, if you will and I, too, proved to be too complicated for his plot. Or maybe, he was too simple for mine. (shrug) What can I say other than,”You’re new girl is lovely, Hubble.“

Despite, the exciting similarities between us, I have failed to follow her Louboutin-priced foot steps, but one can only hope that I’m headed (or my feet are) for that that direction. We fell in love with the show because it had a way of making us cringe and dream all at the same time. And on some summer nights as I find myself walking away from an outing with friends & new acquaintances, I look around at the city and feel a certain kind of daze. Am I on a set? Or is this my life? 

 

*

A few weeks ago, I was chatting with a friend, who is actually a film director, about being alone. Some of us hate being alone, but oddly enough when we’re watching someone being alone, it’s fascinating to us. Why don’t we appreciate our alone time? I don’t know why, but have you noticed that so much is revealed about the character in those very few alone scenes that the director or writer share with you in a story? You note their real expressions, the tones in the feelings seem to jump onto the screen when no words are required to understand the vibes that are being revealed. As the audience, what can you do but observe?

I recently re-posted The Case of the Super Single and I got an email asking me how it’s done. How do you fall in love with this? Well, that’s why I’m bringing up Carrie, because I think it’s a question we all ask as we see our favourite characters walking out onto the streets of some dream-like life. How is it done? So, I have a confession, which I revealed to my director friend. Sometimes, I pretend I’m on set because sometimes the grass is greener on the other side, isn’t it? I remember watching Sex & the City. I remember certain scenes when Carrie is sitting at her desk, on some random summer night, smoking and typing away. I was in college then, but I remember wishing I could write in New York, and have cool nights in like that. A few weeks ago, it dawned on me one night that I was watching the show and thought “how cool is tha…”

Sh*t. I had been overlooking the very opportunity I once drooled over (and still am drooling over).

These “set” moments come to us, but I find that they are rarely appreciated. Carrie’s character fell in love with her set, she indulged in her role as a writer. No matter what happened, you never saw her compromise her passion. It was the very thing that the character kept consistent. She never doubted it. She doubted everything else, but that. Her character never failed to romanticize about the stones that paved the street for her stories. Samantha didn’t want to be Carrie and Carrie didn’t want to be Samantha. That applied across the board and the authenticity of each character made every move count. I’m not going to tell you how it’s done, but I’ll ask you this: What if you were on set? What if the cameras were rolling? What if the silent moments of your life were being watched? Would you enjoy your own story? Would you like your character?

Maybe we should start watching our lives like a film; like a story. There are details you don’t pay attention to while watching, you figure the writer will take you to where you need to be at the end of the series of scenes. You trust. You watch the characters, in their silence, allowing them to be. Stories, however ridiculious and whimsical, eventually find their way back to reality…

Carrie was foolish at times, but we saw her evolve. We even watched Samantha fall in love, so I think there is hope for all our stories to keep changing, don’t you? Maybe we all live on sets… or books, for that matter.

Waiting for Aidan & Vogue,

Tone